by Albert
Posted on 15-06-2020 02:24 AM
Long an extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond compare with that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman. Shortly there after he met a farmer who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the farmer, asking for permission to marry one of them.
7. A bus full of politicians was moving along the country road. Then it crashed into the tree and overturned. Blood and glass were everywhere. A middle-aged farmer working on the field nearby saw the accident and decided to help: he dug a huge hole and buried all the politicians who were still alive. He thought he did his country a good service.
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" to which the farmer replied: "thank god, i thought i had gone deaf!" a lone tourist who is passing through the suburbs on the way to town by car, unfortunately experiences mechanical problems with the automobile. The car stalls and the tourist parks the car by the side of the road and waits for help.
What chickens do when the farmer takes their eggs away! how can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it? by dropping it 7 feet – it won’t break for the first six! how did the egg get up the mountain? it scrambled up! how did the eggs leave the highway? they went through the eggs-it.
Barry farmer got into his toyota 4 by 4 and drove to the neighbouring ranch and knocked at the door. A young boy, neil, aged about 9, opened the door. 'is yer dad home?' barry demanded. 'no, sir, he ain't,' neil replied. 'he went into town. ''well, then,' inquired barry, 'is yer mom here?' 'no, sir, she ain't here neither. She went into town with dad. '.
By harry a farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a special rooster-one that service all of his many hens and when he told this to the market vendor, the vendor replied:’ i have just the rooster for you.
Because the farmer said, “hogwashâ€.
Hot 2 years agoby tats a dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country. After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "oh! those sheep are so adorable!".
A farmer lived on a quiet rural highway. But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an alarming rate. The traffic was so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of three to six a day. So one day he called the sheriff's office and said, "you've got to do something about all of these people driving so fast and killing all of my chickens. " "what do you want me to do?" asked the sheriff.
If you’re injured in an accident, all you want is to get justice from the people at fault. This mission becomes even greater if the accident robs you of valuable property or, heaven forbid, a loved one. In those times, you’ll stop at nothing to hold the responsible parties accountable. When one farmer was hurt in a terrible car crash that also took the life of his beloved mule, he went after the trucking company that caused the wreck. The company’s expensive lawyer thought there was no way a simple farmer could defeat the resources of a massive corporation, but the farmer wasn’t giving up without a fight….
A salesman is driving when his car breaks down. He leaves the car and starts walking and reaches a small farm house. He knocks and a old farmer opens the door. The salesman asks him for a place to sleep in the night. The farmer tells that he has only one room with a bed and on that he and his wife sleep.
What advice does a farmer follow when choosing a tractor? "if it fields good, do it. "ned: you shouldn't let farm animals provoke you. Ed: i can't help it - they goated me! no farm building should ever, under any circumstances, be used as a convent barn nun. The farmer was stressed out. He had a high-thresher job.
Jerry carroll does what he calls a “true farmer†greeting in the lobby of a caribbean-themed casino, a peach-colored concrete complex that interrupts fields of corn close to the minnesota-wisconsin border. “hey, how ya doin’?†he says, waving his hand, folding the tip of his middle finger so it looks like it’s missing.
A farmer counted 196 cows in 
the field. But when he rounded them up, he had 200. A farmer counted 196 cows in 
the field. But when he rounded them up, he had 200. Share.
Q: what do you get if you cross an angry sheep and a moody cow? a: an animal that’s in a baaaaaaaad moooooood! q: do you know why the cow jumped over the moon? a: the farmer had cold hands! q: why did the cow cross the road? a: to get to the udder side!.
“i do not particularly like the word 'work. ' human beings are the only animals who have to work, and i think that is the most ridiculous thing in the world. Other animals make their livings by living, but people work like crazy, thinking that they have to in order to stay alive. The bigger the job, the greater the challenge, the more wonderful they think it is. It would be good to give up that way of thinking and live an easy, comfortable life with plenty of free time. I think that the way animals live in the tropics, stepping outside in the morning and evening to see if there is something to eat, and taking a long nap in the afternoon, must be a wonderful life. For human beings, a life of such simplicity would be possible if one worked to produce directly his daily necessities. In such a life, work is not work as people generally think of it, but simply doing what needs to be done. â€.
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good looking woman, and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied, she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "you have done a really good job and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick.
A farmer named paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the eversweet company. In court, the eversweet company’s hot-shot solicitor was questioning paddy. ‘didn’t you say to the police at the scene of the accident, ‘i’m fine?’ asked the solicitor. Paddy responded: ‘well, i’ll tell you what happened.
This scottish farmer walks into the neighborhood pub , and orders a whiskey.
cowardice - the old farmer and his wife visited the menagerie. When they halted before the hippopotamus cage, he. Read more gaining weight - when his daughter returned from the girls' college, the farmer regarded her critically, and then dem. Read more she will never start - the old farmer and his wife arrived at a railway station, and for the first time in their lives behe. Read more.
Armer joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company (responsible for the accident) to court. In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer joe. "didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'i'm fine?," questioned the lawyer. Farmer joe responded, "well i'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule bessie into the. ".
There was a farmer who raised watermelons. He was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat watermelons. After some careful thought he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. So he made up the sign and posted it in.
Out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named buddy. He hitched buddy up to the car and yelled, "pull, nellie, pull!" buddy didn't move. Then the farmer hollered, "pull, buster, pull!" buddy didn't respond. Once more.
A farmer who's been involved in a terrible road accident with a large truck ended up in court fighting for a big compensation claim. "i understand you're claiming damages for the injuries you're supposed to have suffered?" stated the counsel for the insurance company. "yes, that's right," replied the farmer, nodding his head. "you claim you were injured in the accident, yet i have a signed police statement that says that when the attending police officer asked you how you were feeling, you replied, 'i've never felt better in my life. ' is that the case?" "yeah, but" stammered the farmer. "a simple yes or not will suffice," counsel interrupted quickly. "yes," replied the farmer. Then it was the turn of the farmer's counsel to ask him questions. "please tell the court the exact circumstance of events following the accident when you made your statement of health," his lawyer said. "certainly," replied the farmer. "after the accident my horse was thrashing around with a broken leg and my poor old dog was howling in pain. This cop comes along, takes one look at my horse and shoots him dead. "then he goes over to my dog, looks at him and shoots him dead too. Then he come straight over to me and asked me how i was feeling. "now, what the heck would you have said to him?".
The farmer and the code enforcement officer a vermont farmer was standing in his barnyard when an official-looking car pulled up. The driver got out and introduced himself as the local code enforcement officer. “i was noticing your fence,†he said. “you have three 3-inch rails. You need to have either three 4-inch rails or four 3-inch rails. â€.
A farmer who wants a divorce goes to see a lawyer. The farmer says: “i wants to get one of them dayvorces†lawyer: “do you have grounds? farmer: yes, i gots me 40 acres. Lawyer: no you don’t understand, do you have a suit? farmer: yes, oi wears it to church on sundays. Lawyer: no, i mean do you have a case?.